Lessons Learned from my Eight-Week-Old Daughter
As PAs and NPs, our professions encourage us to be lifelong learners. This not only inspires professional growth, but also allows us to provide the best possible care to our patients every day. This devotion to learning can also be helpful in other areas of our lives. In fact, research shows that being a lifelong learner is associated with a wide range of important adaptive behaviors, including tolerance of anxiety and uncertainty, positive emotions, humor, playfulness, out-of-box thinking, and a noncritical attitude (1).
As a first-time mom, I am constantly reminding myself of these benefits as my husband and I learn the ropes about raising a newborn. It truly has been a beautiful, humbling experience; full of valuable lessons that will not only make me a better person but also a better clinician. Some of the most meaningful include:
Patience is a Virtue: Whether it be waiting for her to fall asleep or having patience with myself while learning to nurse her, I’ve found that parenthood is certainly an exercise in practicing patience.
Giving Yourself Grace: Often, as human beings we beat ourselves up for mistakes and things that are out of our control. I try to remind myself it is okay to mess up! Forgive yourself if that nap didn’t go the way you planned and move on.
Perfect is the Enemy of Done: I would argue that there is a bit of a perfectionist in all of us who practice medicine. It can be both a blessing and a curse. However, in day-to-day parenting, trying to get things perfect is exhausting. Is the laundry done but not put away? Good enough!
Accepting Help: This is probably the biggest area in which I struggle. Historically, society labels a “help seeker” as one who is falling short. I can say with certainty that the support and help I receive from my husband Aaron and my family make me a better mom. Moreover, it allows me to feel less overwhelmed and more apt to take a break without feeling guilty.
Slow Down: Before maternity leave, my weekdays often played out at a breakneck pace, going from clinic to meetings to presentations. I’d wake up, answer some emails, race to the clinic, and do it all over again. I get a lot of joy and fulfillment out of these commitments, but being forced to slow down over the past few months has been a refreshing change of pace—resulting in a greater appreciation for the quiet moments!
I know there are many more lessons to come that I look forward to learning. If nothing else, babydom has given me a new respect for all the parents out there. I hope sharing these lessons and anecdotes inspires you to continue to be a lifelong learner and to look for lessons not only in the clinic, but also in your everyday life.
1. Gruber MJ, Gelman BD, Ranganath C. States of curiosity modulate hippocampus-dependent learning via the dopaminergic circuit. Neuron. 2014 Oct 22;84(2):486-96
Eileen Cheever MPAS, PA-C, resides with her husband Aaron in Lunenburg, Massachusetts. She works at Clearview Dermatology in Leominster, Massachusetts. In her spare time, she enjoys cheering on her favorite Boston sports teams and exploring the outdoors with her husband, their new baby, and their dog, Jasta.